Who writes this stuff?

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I am happily married to an amazing military man who spent 9 years enlisted and is now an Officer in the US Army. We have two amazing boys who are not so little any more! They still infuse every moment of every day with creativity and energy, and make my life an adventure.  I was educated at home, and am now teaching our children - second generation homeschoolers! I try every day to become more like Jesus Christ, and to love like HE does. If you want you can try and catch me at bethylovesandy@yahoo.com

My Blog Title Verse

"For the Lord gives wisdom. From His mouth come knowledge and understanding." Proverbs 2:6 NKJV 
The Message translation puts it this way "God gives out Wisdom free, is plainspoken in Knowledge and Understanding."

Verse of the day

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Better late then never....

It is Christmas night now. We have had four days of Christmas festivities, and all three of my over stimulated and extremely exhausted boys are asleep. Finally, a moment to myself. Breathe in, breathe out. What a lovely sound - near silence.... except for the dryer. Tomorrow the cleanup begins, but for right now, I can just look back and remember the beautiful moments that made up our Christmas celebration this year. What an amazing group of people I have in my life, and I am so thankful every day for each one of them. My family, obviously. Everyone who knows me knows that I have an amazing family. But I am truly blessed by Andy's family too. I am thankful for Andy constantly, and remember to tell God that on a regular basis, but I forget to be thankful for his family too. Without them, he would not be the amazing man that he is. But we also have some amazing friends. I have received Christmas greetings from so many wonderful people, and I am daily reminded how blessed I am for friends. There is a poem about how people come and go, and how some are in your life for just a moment... I forget sometimes how important those moments are. I feel bad because I lose track of people sometimes, or don't get to stay in touch as closely as I want. Trust me, I want to talk to people more, stay in touch better. Since I am not capable of that, I am so thankful for the moments. If a moment is all I get, then I am grateful.
Thank you, anyone who reads this, for taking a moment, and for being part of my life. You have helped to mature me, make me grow in the Lord, given me a moment of joy, and I am so thankful.
Merry Merry Jesus' birthday to you all. Blessings always!
Bethany

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Examples of possible disasters...

My friend Carrie says that every time you think you have run out of things to blog about, watch out... something is sure to happen. The sad thing is that I really hadn't run out of things to say. I had a whole piece already composed in my head about Christmas cookies, and all the adorable and messy things my kids had done while we made them. But that whole thing will stay in my head. Instead I am going to talk about things we (we being mom's) already know, but for some reason have to be reminded of again and again.
If you see something laying out on your counter and your first thought is "I should put that where it belongs. It could ------ (fill in the blank with .... make a huge mess, hurt someone, destroy my entire house) if it fell into the wrong hands." Of course the wrong hands are those of your child, or children, whichever the case may be. Anyway... to finally finish the first sentence, if that is your first thought, put it away. Don't wait. Don't think "I already have three things in my hands, and am on my way to the bathroom, and haven't yet folded the laundry in the dryer, and the washer is already done, and another load is waiting to be put in" Don't think that. I don't care how busy you are. Do not, no matter how busy, merely push the offending item farther back. It will not, let me emphasize that, WILL NOT, be out of reach of your two year old. Also, if you have a two year old, and you think to yourself, lets get a nice little stool for him to stand on, so he can reach things by himself. It will be so helpful. He can wash his own hands, and reach his own snack, and stand on it so he can pee into the toilet by himself. Don't think that, and if you do think it, don't listen to yourself.
Okay, now that I have shared my deep thoughts, let me just tell you about my day, well actually, days, plural.
This week has been overwhelming, for several different reasons, that I won't go into right now. But, yesterday I noticed that the Ben-Gay muscle rub was sitting on the bathroom counter. My first thought was "gee, that would make quite a mess if Zion got ahold of it". But, all I did was scoot it to the back of the counter, and move on with my day. Just a few moments later I noticed a hammer sitting on the counter in the kitchen. I had used it to crack pecans the day before, which leads me to my Christmas wish list... a nutcracker. But, back to the hammer. I just shoved it to the middle of the island, and didn't carry it out to the garage where it belonged. Around 11:30, as I was reading the mail (a Christmas card from one of you, my loyal readers!) and thinking to myself that I should blog that afternoon during nap time, Canaan ran up to me and said "Mommy, Zion is eating something, and it smells spicy." At first I thought he was eating gum, but as I walked up to him, he swallowed hard, then burst into tears. Immediate spike in the worry meter. I got him to show me what he ate, and sure enough, it was Ben-Gay. I started pouring water on him, trying to get it in his mouth and wash it all down, dilute it, cool his throat, whatever. It says to call poison control if it is ingested, so I did. They told me that aspirin is the worrisome ingredient, and that he would have had to have eaten at least a teaspoon to hurt him. Since I didn't know how much he had eaten, perhaps I should take him to the ER. I didn't even know where the ER was!!
Anyway, I called around, Andy asked the guys he worked with for directions, I loaded the kids after getting Zion dressed, since he was still in his pajama's, and they were soaked with the water I had poured all over him, and we headed to the ER. I went rushing in, dragging poor Canaan behind me, and this wonderful, fabulous, old doctor happened to be standing at the reception desk, talking to a nurse. As I come in, obviously nearly in a panic, spouting nonsense about my son eating Ben-gay, the doctor just said, "I'm sure he is fine." And suddenly, all was right in the world again. Amazing, isn't it, how just a few simple words from the right person can make the world starting spinning again, and breathe begin filling your lungs again. The doctor looked at him, told me that he really doubted Zion had eaten enough to make him sick, since the stuff tastes terrible, and that I should just give him lots of fluids and try to flush it out of him and keep it diluted. No need to pump his stomach, or give him that charcoal junk, or even do any blood work. Within five minutes of walking into the ER, I was back in the car, and beginning to see the humor in the whole situation.
I can only assume that Zion thought it was toothpaste.
Poor thing, that wasn't the end of his day, or mine either! Later that day, obviously with no side effects, he pulled his little stool over to the kitchen island, and while I loaded the dinner dishes in to the dishwasher, climbed up, got ahold of the hammer I had noticed earlier, and carried it off. He then proceeded to beat repeatedly on the door leading to the garage. unfortunately, it is always loud at my house, so it actually took me a few minutes to notice that the noise level was higher then usual. By that time he had put about 15 little dents in our metal door. Beautiful!
Luckily, it was nearly bedtime by then, or I may have just completely lost my mind, curled up in a ball, and gone to sleep myself.
Today I took the boys to base and dropped them off with Andy around 1. He was able to get off work early and take them home, so that I could go to my 4th doctor's appointment in two weeks time. (nothing serious, just the usual diabetes and thyroid stuff, with a new doctor, in a new town, so extra work) Anyway, when Andy got home with them, Canaan was asleep, so he let Zion out of the car, and started to carry Canaan in to his bed. Somehow Zion managed to trip and fall on his little pedal car. Beautiful split, straight across his forehead! Needless to say, Canaan got woken up, because Andy had to put him down, run and find a towel, and soak up blood! According to Andy, Canaan was wonderful big helper, holding pressure on Zion's head while Daddy tried to find the antibiotic cream. By the time I got home it was a beautiful bump, and still slightly scary looking, but done bleeding.
That child may not make it to 2. He only has 2 days left until he turns two, and I may have to put him in a padded room, with only stuffed animals to play with just so he can survive that long. Goodness, he has worn out my emotions these last two days! Physically I am pretty worn out too, but it is the sudden panic, and the crashing relief that really wear you out!
That's my story... learn from it!

Friday, December 07, 2007

Cucumbers

Just a really quick funny story. I made a homemade pizza a few days ago for lunch. Nothing fancy - boboli whole wheat crust, zucchini in marinara sauce, some green peppers and cheese. Not something exactly kid friendly, but my boys are pretty laid back, so I thought it would go over fine. Canaan was not impressed. After picking off some of the cheese, the scraping off the toppings and eating the crust plain, he starting the bargaining for something different. "Mommy, if I eat one more bite, can I have something different?" Usually I just say no, but I was in a laid back mood, so I asked what he wanted. He said, " Momma, we haven't had cucumber in DAYS! Can we have some cucumber?" I personally am not too fond of cucumber, and it had been months since we had eaten one, but for some strange reason I had bought one recently. My four year old son proceeded to eat an entire half of a cucumber for lunch. Plain. So random, but he was happy, I was happy, and Daddy ate the leftover pizza when he got home, so he was happy too. I just thought it was pretty funny that he didn't ask for junk food at all, just a cucumber. Kids!

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Confirmation

First of all - Thanks to all those who have posted, or sent me E-mails of encouragement. It is amazing how much better you feel when you are reminded that you are loved. God and I had a really good heart to heart. He reminded me once again that he always always always brings something good out of the bad. He doesn't plan the bad to punish us, he doesn't want bad things to happen just so he can work something good, but because the world he created is no longer perfect, and the people he created with so much love are no longer walking in his presence, then sometimes bad things happen. And when they do, he is sad with us, hurts with us, and finds a way to make something good happen in spite of it. With some bad things, I may never see the good, but I completely believe that it is there. I don't have to put my hands on it to believe it is there - I just trust.
Last night was the ladies Christmas party at my church. We all brought a Christmas ornament and had a gift exchange. It was all random, with numbers assigned for tables, then find someone you didn't know already and trade - stuff like that. Afterward they were having people talk about their new friend, and the ornament they received. One lady stood up and explained that she had a miscarriage earlier this year, and they had named the baby Hope. She said she had already told her husband that the only thing she wanted for her Christmas tree this year was Hope. Amazingly enough, out of about 200 ladies and their ornaments, she had received one that said HOPE. I was so blessed by that story. God was listening to her, and gave her that tiny little gift to remind her that HE is always listening. He cares.
I have been struggling with my Christmas letter this year. I can't write it. I certainly don't want to write about losing Anastasia in my Christmas letter, but I can't seem to write a letter talking about our year with out her. So, Andy is supposed to take that duty over. If you get a Christmas card from me that has no letter, is only signed with our names, you will know who's fault that is. I really need to get them out, since we have moved and a lot of people don't have our new address. Oh well. Anyone who reads this, send me an E-mail with your address please. I have a lot of addresses, but I know I am missing quite a few too.
I am rambling now, which means I should quit. Thanks for caring people. I don't take you for granted, and I really appreciate the kind words.

Saturday, December 01, 2007

Still healing

I heard a really great message on the radio the other day, about how we need to appreciate our time with God. Not let it just become routine, the same all the time, dry. I was convicted. I have been pretty faithful lately, keeping up with my Bible reading plan, even learning new things. But I have definitely lost something lately. I am pretty sure I know what it is. I am not really letting myself be honest with God. I stick to the safe topics... thanks for my wonderful kids, beautiful house, hard working husband, etc. My prayers are crying out with one question.... over and over, and I won't let myself ask, because I know there is no answer. Why is it when we know the answer, or that there is no answer, it is still really hard to just let it go?
The worst part is that there are so many people who have lost so much more than I have. When I hear stories, even meet people, who are rightfully upset I feel so ridiculous. Why can't I get over a tiny little pea, whom I only knew about for a week. I would be 20 weeks now. We would know if it was a girl or boy. I would be signing my Christmas cards Andy, Bethany, Canaan, Zion and baby. I torture myself, and I know that. It is a choice, to let myself suffer, and sometimes I chose correctly.... sometimes I don't.
I guess what I need to do it just ask. I know God isn't angry when we ask stupid questions. He created us. Hopefully he understands us better than we do. So even though there is no answer possible, I have to ask Why. There is no why, no reason, but I have to put my pain and confusion back in his hands. I am sure I will try to steal it back again. Pain is beautiful to let go of, but so tempting to pick back up again.
There are so many others, who hurt so much worse. I try to think of them instead. It doesn't seem as selfish to cry for others, to feel their pain just a tiny bit.