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I am happily married to an amazing military man who spent 9 years enlisted and is now an Officer in the US Army. We have two amazing boys who are not so little any more! They still infuse every moment of every day with creativity and energy, and make my life an adventure.  I was educated at home, and am now teaching our children - second generation homeschoolers! I try every day to become more like Jesus Christ, and to love like HE does. If you want you can try and catch me at bethylovesandy@yahoo.com

My Blog Title Verse

"For the Lord gives wisdom. From His mouth come knowledge and understanding." Proverbs 2:6 NKJV 
The Message translation puts it this way "God gives out Wisdom free, is plainspoken in Knowledge and Understanding."

Verse of the day

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Selfishness and Underpants

I have been slightly "off" the last couple of days. I am part of a ladies bible study that focuses on being good wives. This week our "homework" was to try our best to be unselfish, giving of ourselves, less focused on what we are missing out on.
Now, this is going to sounds like bragging, but truly and honestly, I think I can say that selfishness is not normally something I struggle with. I have plenty of other weaknesses, and sins that I struggle with, but selfishness truly isn't one of my usual sins.
However, with the focus on it this week in our Bible study, I seem to have had to fight (and fail) this week miserably. I have noticed every single time that Andy has NOT done something I wanted him to. I have been offended every time he didn't carry his plate over, or rub my feet even though I rubbed his shoulders, or let me sleep in a few extra minutes, even though he kept me up late every single night this week (he has been working the swing shift, and I have waited up for him), and I had let him sleep late every other day.
So, even though I wasn't DOING anything selfish, I was being selfish in my attitude. And it was starting to show in my mood. I finally broke down and let him know how I felt.
Poor thing - He can't read my mind... So he had no idea that I wanted my shoulders rubbed, or 15 minutes of extra sleep. Just because I know to give it to him automatically, does not mean that he can think to give it to me automatically. It just isn't part of how he is made.
So, he declared that I have to get over expecting him to know - I have to ask.
I will work on that.

Yesterday Andy declared that he wasn't sure he wanted me going to this bible study anymore. He thought that our marriage was happier before I started going to the "Make your Marriage stronger" bible study! That day I had to agree.
Of course, some of it might be because I am PMSing...

Now, to end to end on a lighter note. How about a few Zion stories.
A few days ago Z was sitting at the table, singing, as usual. He makes up songs, about everything you can imagine, on a regular basis.
As he ate his lunch he was singing, "shake your bum bum, shake your bum bum." Then, he changed the chorus... "shake your wee wee, shake your wee wee".
Now, when he goes potty I often tell him to "shake shake" before he pulls his pants up - but I have never told him to shake his wee wee. I really don't know where he came up with that. But, I think Andy nearly came to tears he was laughing so hard.

Then today when we were at the mall Andy took Z to the bathroom. He came back laughing, once again, at our little one.
When we got home I took at picture of the reason why.

See anything wrong with his underpants?

He likes to completely strip when he "sits down", and it seems he had put them back on by himself this afternoon.
I don't think that could possibly be comfortable, but he didn't complain.
They were so stretched out that I just threw them away!


Karen said...

LOL...little boys are SO much fun....

Mary said...

Joel likes to put his underpants on backwards too. But the waist is still the waist. LOL I wanted to take a picture this weekend too of it but he had changed them back before I could. Thanks for sharing yourself Bethany.

Carrie said...

Oh that is HILARIOUS!!!!!
And I have to agree...when I read the little "snippet" on facebook where it said "being unselfish" my IMMEDIATE thought was "SHE DOES NOT struggle with that in her marriage!!!" So, you aren't bragging if it's the truth stated modestly! ha ha!
I agree that a "making your marriage stronger" study isn't something you need. Maybe you could look on it as being able to contribute your modest opinion of how you make things work lol, instead of "trying" to do better. I am so selfish so many times, I know I would benefit :)

autumnesf said...

But you did learn something in the long run. And you did talk to your husband about it. It's all good. Who knows, maybe there is something in this study that God has for you.

And the shake....

We got a call from the Christian pre-school we sent our son to because he was singing the Hokey Pokey. You put your left peni* in, your put your left.....

Still trying to figure out who he knew that had a left and a right.

Marcy said...

I have never thought of you as a selfish person. I think things like that all the time and feel like Scott should just automatically do some things and those kinds of things just don't come naturally to a lot of people. I think that Bible studies like that can be good, but if you are around people who don't have a great relationship with their husband, they might complain and make you think of things that you don't like about Andy that you never noticed before. I have never been in that specific situation, but I have worked in a job where the more people I became friends with at my job and listened to them complaining about everyone else, the more bitter I became about being a harder worker than other people or whatever the situation was. So, it's kind of something you have to make a decision on with your judgement. I enjoyed my daily dose of Bethany. Have a good day!

Anonymous said...

awe what a big boy!!!!!