One step at a time

 We saw a chicken crossing the road yesterday, oblivious and unconcerned about anything else, and it was beautiful. Colorful. Happy. Content. 

 Andy, Ellen (his mom) and I had to laugh.

 There has been so much heaviness recently: Losing my Father-in-law, Dane, to Covid. The rest of us being sick, and Andy much sicker than I was comfortable with, at the same time. Canaan away at Basic Training. Our new house needing more work than we thought, and all of the work being delayed by all the sickness. Andy on his final leave for the army and trying to adjust to the non-army world. (And find a new job)

 Seeing that chicken cross the road was simply beautiful. Laughing was so very needed. 

 It brought back the memory of the chicken crossing the road before. 

 My life has been filled with so many interesting moments. Really good ones and some really bad too. But full of interesting moments. I have to remember to celebrate. 

 This last month has been rough, but as HE reminds me over and over, I can trust Him. 

 The sweet little frog in that picture, barely peeking through the scripture, brought me a joyful reminder last week in the garden. The garden was Dane’s. Most of what I know about gardening I learned from him, and the garden is where he and I shared our love for God’s amazing creation. In 20 years as his Daughter in law, that has been our common bond. Growing. (And loving Andy) Without Dane here to help I have not maintained his garden well. All I did during the several weeks of covid and then the heaviness that it left behind, was pick what was ripe every few days. 

 But it has also been where I am able to mourn, and that sweet little frog was a beautiful reminder that beauty is hiding. Lovely things are often there, harder to see but definitely there, if we are willing to look. 

 Hear that, please. 

 Lovely things are there. 

 

 We just have to be willing to look. 

 I won’t pretend that the ugly things are not there. They still exist, and at times are almost overwhelming. But I was reminded, and I want to share with you, that the lovely things are there! 

 This quote was in one of my devotionals this morning. 

“No matter what you face, trust God, and know that He will surely answer at the right time.” New Life Church, Bandra

This is the key thing that stood out to me. “At the right time.” 

 I am holding to that promise. I hope you will too. 

 Be blessed my friends. One step at a time, remembering to look for the good and allowed to cry in the bad. 

Produce Perseverance

While “cleaning” today I found this following message, a response to a text message or perhaps an email, that I had copied and saved in the “notes” on my phone. I don’t remember who it was originally written to, or if I even sent it, but I have people in my life that it fits. Finding it now, more than a year after it was originally written, I want to make these words available. I want to point out this truth, again. 

 “No argument from me that some things are just bad. And many of them we never get to see any good come from. Perhaps no good does ever come from them, if no one is asking God for it? Rom 8:28 adds at the end “for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes”. If no one is seeking the good, perhaps it is just completely bad? I don’t pretend to know the answer to that. You have seen a lot more bad than I have my friend. And very different bad.

 I do think though that joy is a choice. And it is nothing like happiness. No, a tree cannot choose it’s fruit, but the amount of sun it soaks up, reaching out its branches with hope, and the amount of rain it reaches out for, digging those roots deeper into the unforgiving soil around it... those things make the fruit stronger, and bigger, and sweeter. The tree is planted, and it is what it is... but it gets to choose whether it shrivels up or reaches out. 

 And just because it chooses one thing one day, doesn’t mean it doesn’t get to/have to choose again, the next day, and the next, over and over, choosing. 

 Some days I don’t choose to look for the good. Some days, in all honesty, I curl up and ask God to please let me die. When I have had blood sugar readings of 400 and 45 in the same day. When I have had 4 seizures in 12 hours time. When I have thrown up, for no diagnosable reason, over and over- sometimes I forget to look for the good. I forget to seek joy, when happiness seems so far away. I am just tired. 

 But Joy, not happiness, is always there. Always.”

JOY is strong here today. 

 There is nothing new on me, medically. 

 There is nothing new on selling the house, Andy getting a new job, or moving closer to our parents.

 There is nothing new on my mom’s broken body, the lack of medical equipment at the hospital in Kenya my BIL works at, (please go read that one) or the angst people carry about the world in general. 

 Yet, JOY is a choice and I am choosing it. 

 Please, join me in choosing it. 

 I am so glad to have found that old message, written in a time of pain, reminding me that those very trials faced have already produced perseverance. 

Grow my friends. Grow those roots down deep. Soak up the rainwater, even when they sometimes seem to be bigger rain drops than you think you can handle. Grow those branches strong, able to handle the wind. Grow those leaves full and thick, able to offer shade to those around you who are having a hard day. 

 Be blessed as you grow my friends!

The story continues...

Remember the new growth springing up from the ashes in the back yard? 

 Look how much it has grown! 

The green growth is still reaching toward the sky with praise filled arms. 

The beautiful red has declared it’s purpose and shown it’s glory. 

(And tasted delicious) 😋 

The story continues. 

Remember the broken branch? 

It looks sad at first glance. 

The tomatoes near by have been harvested. 

Many leaves have accomplished their purpose, turned brown and volunteered for their time of rest.  

But wait....

That new growth is from it!

New life, new green, new tomatoes- farther away, but still part of the broken branch.

Still part of the healing branch. 

The story continues. 

“Though the fig tree may not blossom, Nor fruit be on the vines; Though the labor of the olive may fail, And the fields yield no food; Though the flock may be cut off from the fold, And there be no herd in the stalls— Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation.”

‭‭Habakkuk‬ ‭3:17-18‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Even when the vine has no fruit... 

or so little that it is hard to see.

“Be cheerful with joyous celebration in every season of life. Let joy overflow, for you are united with the Anointed One!”

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:4‬ ‭TPT‬‬

There is lots of yuck in the world around us. 

Sickness. Anger. Separation. Hurt. 

Lots of yuck. 

But, there is rejoicing called for in every season. 

It is a choice. 

Find the good. 

Look farther.

There IS still a tomato on the broken branch.

There IS new growth coming from the ashes. 

There is healing happening. 

Keep looking. 

Keep rejoicing, even when the celebration worthy events are harder to see. 

You ARE blessed my friends. Choose to see it. 

The story continues!

A healing branch

 I love my garden. It is a place of refuge, a place of worship, a place of learning, a reminder of hope. It is where I often speak to God, and hear from Him as well. 

A few weeks ago I missed several days of upkeep in a row. Distractions keep me from going out and checking on it and when I finally did things had grown, obviously. 

I trimmed back some growth that was unhealthy. Picked off some sneaky insects. Removed some weeds that were stealing nutrients. Then, I reached into the tomato bed to tuck a branch back inside the support system, back inside the ring of wire built to hold it up and I moved too quickly. I bent it without caution and it snapped. 

I heard it snap and I immediately thought, “well, that’s over”. 

I almost cut it the rest of the way off. 

I almost accepted failure for that branch, 

I almost gave up any hope. 

But.... there were tomatoes already growing on that branch and I wanted to give them a chance to ripen so I left it. 

The tomatoes that I noticed at that moment have already been picked.

More have shown themselves. 

This, this picture is new growth. 

These are new blossoms, new life, growing on that branch.

The branch that snapped, the branch that looks ugly, the branch that seemed without hope...

It has new life. 

Almost three weeks later, it refuses to give up. 

There are so many things in our world that seem broken, that seem without hope. 

Please, don’t give up! 

Give them the support that they need. 

Move with the gentleness that is required and lift them with the strength they deserve. 

Broken branches can be healed, 

New life can spring up! 

Trim back the unhealthy parts. Pick off the pesky insects. Pull out the weeds that are stealing the nutrients. 

But don’t break off the branch. 

Don’t give up. 

Beauty from ashes

 This is a picture of the area we jokingly call “the back 40”. Behind the fence, it is the unused, uncultivated, “extra” space. In the distance you can see the extra boards, the unsalvageable pieces from tearing down the fence and extending. 

 We have planted several baby trees, and sprinkled wildflower seeds. We have cleared the land of excess pine trees, but not everything. 

 There has been a compost pile. A burn pile. A trial run at a water line from the “creek” to the garden. (That failed, since the creek is only seasonal)

 But this summer it has given me a beautiful gift. Can you see it? 

I will zoom in a little. 

One more time...

There, springing up voluntarily from the burn pile, is a tomato plant. 

Already blooming and sharing life. 

 Yes, I know, nothing like an oak, but go read that verse again, please. 

Ashes represented so much in the Old Testament. Ashes were for mourning. Ashes were used for payment of sin. Ashes were sad, and dirty and yet.... In that verse in Isaiah they were traded for a crown of beauty. 

This gorgeous tomato plant, springing up from the ashes, is such a gift to me. 

It is a crown of beauty. 

Free. 

Full of festive praise instead of despair. 

I don’t know if you will have a literal tomato, but I know that if you look, if you truly open your eyes and seek, you will find something growing out of ashes. 

Be still. Be quiet. 

Find your beauty growing from the ashes and let it lead you to festive praise. 

Then, stop again and remember that last line. 

“For His own glory”. 

If you are a follower of Jesus, if you are seeking Jehovah, then THAT is your calling. 

Seek the beauty in the ashes. 

Accept that crown.

Be a strong oak, or a plentiful tomato, or a cucumber reaching out, or a rose with both thorns and blossoms. 

HE can use us all. 

But then...

Then, glorify Him. 

Be blessed my friends! Seek the beauty in the ashes and trade what you discover for a crown of beauty. 

Little hands

I haven’t had much to say the last couple of weeks. After being sick, I remained tired.

 No surprise :) 

Staying home, and safe, and away from germs...the days started to run together and I might have lost my mind, just a little. 

Thankfully, I have really good friends to help bring it back! 

We went fishing, and enjoyed fellowship with other humans while still staying a safe distance apart. 

Suddenly, and I do mean suddenly, because I don’t know how this happened, I had a 17 year old son. 

 Things began to open. Canaan went back to work. Andy’s schedule was fuller again. 

My garden took all of my time, both the vegetables and the flowers. 

Then, this last weekend, we had tiny little enthusiastic voices and feet and hands come over and it was beautiful. 

Their love for, and joy inspired by, God’s creation almost matches mine, and that was so much fun for me to spend time with! 

And yes, I am aware that makes me have the maturity level of a 3, 5 and 7 year old.

I don’t mind. 

I am the only one who talks to my plants, so I have even them beat on that one. 

 Squash and zucchini were delicious for dinner and there are more ripe and ready already. I meant to send some home with them, but of course I had a seizure 15 min before they left and my brain wasn’t fully functioning as they loaded the vehicle :( 

Looks like we will be eating them here instead. 

None of them like raw tomatoes (!) but they enjoyed picking them for me. 

The cucumbers weren’t as plentiful yet, but we had enough for the weekend. 

Oh, the simple things. 

 This verse remains one of my theme verses. 

When you choose it, when you make the decision to give thanks wherever you are, whatever is taking your time or attention...well, giving thanks becomes easier and easier. 

When you are giving thanks often, then Philippians 4:4 becomes easier and easier too.

So, several weeks later, here is the same reminder as always. 

Choose to be thankful. 

Choose to celebrate.

Choose JOY. 

Be blessed my friends, and give blessings to others as you go. 

Be a cucumber

Do you see the cucumber vine, reaching out? 

A tiny little curl, stretching, with faith that it will find something to hold on to as it grows. 

That is us my friends. 

That is the choice we have to make. 

Stretch, with faith. 

Reach out, choosing to “cast all our cares on Him because He cares for us”. 

1 Peter 5:7, paraphrased

Be a cucumber. 

I am re-reading, for the third time now, Practicing His Presence. It is a compilation of the works of two different missionaries, from two different times. Frank Laubach, from the 1930’s and Brother Lawrence, from 1692. 

When I read it the first time, over 20 years ago, it seemed striking. I was young and in college. Ready to change the world. I was going to commit every moment to Jesus. I was going to avoid every distraction. I was ready to practice the presence of God.

When I read it the second time, about 10 years ago it was a beautiful, gentle reminder. I had toddlers and time was hectic, so the reminder to give every second to my Savior was needed. 

This time it was striking in a completely different way. 

Why did I need the reminder? How had I forgotten to give every second to a Him? What was wrong with my walk!! 

And then, in my angst filled guilt trip, my Savior reminded me that He feels the cucumber vine. 

When I reach out, He notices. 

Every single tiny reach.

When I am washing the dishes and lifting up requests, He hears. 

When the music is going as I fold the laundry, He is hearing my praise. 

When the meds are more than I can take and an afternoon nap is needed, yet again, as I pray myself to sleep He is hearing that too.

This is the side of my fridge. 

Every time I turn around, every time I walk by, someone on it gets a prayer. 

Add yourself. Send a picture.

It looks full, but I will find a place for you. 

I think that perhaps my favorite quote of the book, in all of it’s simplicity is this- 

“This is the best way to act: talk a great deal to the Lord.” Frank Laubach 

Be a cucumber.

Reach out.

Talk a great deal. 

Take the time to listen as well. 

This is a gentle reminder to commit every moment, and to remember that “every moment” includes the busy ones and the boring ones, the beautiful ones and the ugly ones. Please, spend some time in focused prayer, on your knees before God. But don’t forget to talk to Him as you dig in the garden, or paint the living room, or cook, or knit or clean up spilled milk or break up yet another fight. 

Talk to God. 

Be blessed my friends.

Know that you are prayed for. 

Squashed joy?

Yesterday I sent this picture to my mom and sisters, talking about that tiny little squash peeking out, and the joy of the new life of spring. 

Today I feel like the poor little pepper plant that you can barely see being squished by the squash plant in the far left of the picture. 

 My epilepsy is being difficult.

I am tired. 

I forget to support my men when I am tired, and that makes me feel bad about myself. 

So much depends on perspective. 

So much depends on attitude. 

So very much is a choice. 

I will preach that over and over. 

Rejoice in the Lord, always. 

Even when you don’t feel particularly rejoice-full.

Even when perhaps you feel slightly squashed. 

The enemy of our Savior does not like it when we are joyful, so I am fairly confident it annoys him when we share it. 

So share that joy, even when you are feeling slightly squashed.

Rejoice in the Lord, always! 

Again I will say, REJOICE! 

Planting seeds and tearing down fences

 Weary. Oh, what an appropriate word! I am certainly weary this evening!

 It has been a very full week. Very full two weeks, actually. 

 We had gone to GA to see lots of people that we love for Spring Break. Then, while we were there the world sort of fell apart. We ended up coming “home” early, since everything around us was closing - schools, churches, jobs and stores. We never got to visit several people that we loved, because suddenly germs, and sharing them, were a much bigger fear than ever before. 

 Coronavirus. 

 We started this week unsure of everything. 

I think that perhaps we are ending it still unsure of quite a few things. 

 But we stayed busy! Andy does not know how to sit still, and I am not very good at telling him no. 

 So, we tore down the back fence. 

Then moved it back about 16 feet. 

 We “dug” a lot of holes, (he got an auger for his birthday) and leveled and cemented new posts into them. 

Actually, we were able to reuse most of the old posts. We discovered the reason the fence was falling over was, in part, because there was so little cement used the first time it was built. 

Most of the fence tear down and rebuild was Andy. The boys helped a good bit, obviously, and I chipped in some, but truly, that man has way too much energy! 

He is a huge part of why I am “weary” here at the end of this week.

But not the only reason!

I also planted things.

The herbs survived the winter beautifully, one in each bed. 

 I added a few plants and a zillion seeds and spent some time cheering on the beautiful little surprise growth springing up in all three. 

 Some of it was weeds, obviously, but I am almost positive there are about a dozen tomato plants and a dozen peppers and several squash as well. We’ll see if my judgement is right in a few weeks. For now I will let them grow. 

 Then I bought some berry plants too! 

You can’t really see them but there are six, each peeking out of those mounds of red clay, attempting life in the Deep South. 

 And sweet Samwise has been so confused! He knows where the fence use to be, and walks to the edge of it and smells, then stops, afraid he will get in trouble if he goes farther. In the above picture he is laying right at the border... testing things. 

That seems to be the summary of our lives right now, I think. 

Testing things. 

What works and what doesn’t? 

How do we best help our neighbor? 

How do we plants good seeds without being weary? 

 Some of that was literal. The neighbor girl came and planted seeds with me. She fed me joy while I gave her attention. I don’t think we succeeded in staying 6ft apart the whole time, but we soaked up sunshine and placed seeds into egg cartons. 

 So, that is how I want to close this- plant some good seeds with your neighbors. 

Tear down some fences that you usually don’t have time to even consider. 

Use this change of schedule for something beautiful. 

Be blessed my friends, in the middle of the unknown, 

Plants good seeds! That wonderful harvest is promised!

Creativity calls

We planted bulbs today. Prepping for next spring, while the fabulous fall weather is in full swing.
 It was dirty, sweaty work, but so much fun!
 Canaan and Zion helped pick spots, dig holes, plant and cover the little bundles of potential. They actually both lasted almost the whole time. While I was putting away the tools and sweeping up the mess they both went inside to clean up. Cool down. Get a drink.
 Imagine my surprise when I walked in and was greeted with "Mom, we are ready to give you your massage."

 They had placed a towel on the couch, prepared steamy cloths, and were ready to serve. Canaan rubbed my head, Zion steamed my feet and they both helped "beat the stress away" on my back.

 All their idea.

 Completely their planning.

 What amazing boys I have!

 I, obviously, don't have any pictures. I was quite willing to just lay down and let them pamper me! However, I do have some pictures of what my boys have been up to recently.

 The Cardinal's men, fighting against The Musketeers.

 Super hero facepaint

 Fishing in the rain

 With our good friend Asher.

Lot's of art...

 Icecream art

 Crocheting: Headband (Zion helped!)

 Coaster (Canaan did most of this himself)

 And a sock puppet,

with a superhero's cape.

Good stuff, keeping us busy, and having some great learning moments! 

Blessings,