Side note for Lindsey

I actually have not read anything Shel Silverstein, except for "The Giving Tree". So, I cannot give you any advice on him. I loved "A child's garden of verses" when I was a child, and have read some to my boys. I love the illustrations of Eloise Wilkin, so I read them that "version", as well as anything else of hers that I can get my hands on. If you don't know of her, I highly recommend getting your hands on anything she has drawn. Her pictures of babies and children are my favorites! A lot of her stuff is available in Little Golden Book form. 

 My boys are not as enthusiastic about poetry as I had hoped, but they don't seem to hate it. They aren't even real fans of nursery rhymes. But, they love Dr. Seuss, and A.A. Milne!   

A quick note

Mom was complaining today because I haven't blogged in several days. Sorry! I have had what I thought was a 24 hour bug, but instead has turned into a 3 day headache. Literally. I finally went to the doctor today, and they gave me an antibiotic, just in case, a steroid (because he thinks it is just allergies, and that is supposed to help !?!) and a super dose of Ibuprofen (which is the part that is actually doing something!) Anyway, I am hoping that 24 hours on 800mg, every four hours will work. I have had 400 mg every four hours the last two days, including the middle of the night, and that hasn't quite cut it. But I am very optimistic that I will be better tomorrow. So, hopefully I will be writing more tomorrow. I actually have LOTS to say! 

The last one for tonight...

Poor little Zi has been sick today. It really didn't start until we were at the commissary this afternoon, but he got a dreadful fever. He pretty much slept all afternoon, and didn't get to go to Emma's birthday party this evening. Around 10, after everything was calm and quiet, he woke up screaming bloody murder. He was just shaking, then stiff as a board, this shaking again. I thought he might be having a seizure or something. I don't think he was really awake at first. We put a cool washcloth on his face, since he was burning up again, then I just held him for awhile. He wanted his blanket on him, even though he was burning up, so I guess the fever was making him have chills. Anyway... we gave him Motrin and put him back to bed.  He woke up again a few minutes ago, but not nearly as much as before. I think that is my sign that I better get to bed, since I may be getting up again in a few hours to soothe a sick baby!

 Hopefully he will feel better in the morning!

Pancreas

I found this poem last night when I was wandering around the wonderful world of blogs. As someone whose pancreas does not always work properly, but does still do many things it is supposed to, I really got a kick out of this. I would like to "second the emotion" and give my faulty, but still useful, pancreas some praise!

Anywhere, Anywhere. I don't know...

I have been trying to introduce Canaan and Zion to poetry, but wanted to start pretty simple. Besides Dr. Suess, who better than A. A. Milne, right? (the author of Winnie-the-pooh) This was tonight's poem, and for some reason, it just really struck me.

Spring Morning

Where am I going? I don't quite know.

Down to the stream where the king-cups grow-

Up on the hill where the pine-tress blow-

Anywhere, anywhere. I don't know.

Where am I going? The clouds sail by,

Little ones, baby ones, over the sky.

Where am I going? The shadows pass,

Little ones, baby ones, over the grass.

If you were a cloud, and sailed up there,

You'd sail on water as blue as air,

And you'd see me here in the fields and say:

"Doesn't the sky look green today?'

Where am I going? The high rooks call:

"It's awful fun to be born at all."

Where am I going? The ring-doves coo:

"We do have beautiful things to do."

If you were a bird, and lived on high,

You'd lean on the wind when the wind came by,

You'd say to the wind when it took you away:

"That's where I wanted to go today!"

Where am I going? I don't quite know.

What does it matter where people go?

Down in the wood where the blue-bells grow-

Anywhere, anywhere. I don't know.

A. A. Milne, 1924

I want to remember that thought process, and make sure my children are allowed to enjoy it. Right now, they do not have to have a plan. They do not have to have a goal. They can lean on the wind, and go where it takes them. Anywhere.... anywhere.

My truth for today

I think the biggest thing God has been impressing upon me is that we HAVE to stay in his word. There are a thousand different translations, and I don't know if I have an opinion about if one is better than another. Obviously, the original Hebrew for the Old Testament and the original Greek for the New Testament, but honestly, how many of us know Greek or Hebrew? Even I, the daughter of a preacher, know very little of either one. So, with every translation, there are going to be arguments. How accurate? How spirit led? Sometimes after one of these discussions, I just want to quit reading the Bible all together. But I have a generous God, and he always reminds me that HE WILL SPEAK if I am trying to listen. And I deeply believe that the first step to trying to listen is to study all his words. If you seek him, you will find him. Right now, I am really enjoying "The Message" version. It doesn't even try to be a translation, just a version. I guess for a specific question, I would want to try some other translation, but for every day, just seeking God, and trying to hear his voice, I am enjoying it. I guess what that boils down to is that I trust that Eugene Peterson was truly seeking God's leading.

My dad stands strong by the King James, or the New King James. Something about "the original text it was translated from" is older and more accurate. Since he is the one who taught me, most of my verses I have memorized and stored in my heart are in New King James.

I started this post around 10 this morning. It is now 5:21pm. Oops! I guess I will close, and post, and add more later! For now, the point I am trying to make is, Seek God, through his word, and He will give you truth. But you have to seek with your whole heart.

Bethany

Truth

I read a lot of blogs. It is just something I like to do in my "free time" (ie: when I should be sleeping). Within my circle of blogs there has been a lot of questions, and opinions, and posturing on "truth". Because of that, truth has been on my mind, and has been part of my ongoing discussion with God. It was pretty thrilled today when our church started a new "8 part series" about the cornerstones of what we believe. There was a lot of talk today about truth, and a beautiful time of prayer after the sermon. The pastor actually asked for everyone who is seeking more understanding of the truth to come down for prayer. I had JUST THAT MORNING asked for a deeper understanding of truth, and there was the pastor, asking to pray for ME!!!! I just love when God gives me confirmation that he really is listening.

John 8:45 is Jesus speaking, and he says "because I tell the truth, you do not believe me". BECAUSE? Really? I have never really understood that before, but I think I got it today. We, as humans, don't want to know the truth if it is uncomfortable. If it doesn't fit into what we have already decided, then we don't want to believe it. Our pride, our own identity, our own "reality" can keep us from the truth. It is easier to not believe the truth.

I am doing a lot of searching right now. Truth seems absolute, and that is scary. I don't like absolutes. I am a pretty flexible person, in most things and thoughts. But I know that I am supposed to seek truth, in all areas. I am going to try to keep this string of thought going on here over the next few weeks. I cannot promise that I will always be absolute, but I will be seeking, and sharing. Stay tuned....

Kelsey and Travis: Wedding pics

Here are a few pictures from the wedding. It was beautiful, without too much drama at the last minute. We worked our butts off, but I actually had a lot of fun too! These are the "official" pictures, just a few of them. I will go through the ones I took too, and get some that are a little more "gritty". Please please comment!! I will pass it along to Kelsey.

A birthday party

I have missed my blog sooooo much!
We have been non-stop wedding plans this last week. It has been so much fun though, and it is all starting to pull together. Unfortunately, there is so much about a wedding that you cannot do until the last minute. That makes for rough times for the bridesmaids! Thankfully, we are a close crew, and can work well together even when we are exhausted to the point of silliness. Of course, the reason we are exhausted is because we have also been having lots of fun too!
The last two days have been devoted to the wedding programs. Since each one takes about 2 full minutes to make.... times 25o of them.... it has been a big job. We have recruited lots of help- not only bridesmaids, but their significant others also, and a friend from out of state who drove in early just to be helpful. Life is good.
Tonight we took a break from wedding stuff and had a birthday party for Canaan. We went to Chuck E Cheese. I think it was lots of fun, and not too stressful, so I guess it was a success. There were about 15 adults, and only 5 children, and that is a really good ratio for the CEC! The adults really need to outnumber the kids, or it is crazy. I will say that a Tuesday night while school is still in session is a great time to go. It was not crowded at all. I will post pictures next week. I left my cord at my house, and we are staying at my parents until Sun. so my pictures are trapped on my camera for now.
Just a quick story to close now. On the way home from the party tonight Canaan was riding in the car with my parents and they were talking about rhyming. After rhyming frog and log, Canaan said he wanted to sing "that song about frogs and logs". My Mom started some song, which I think she was making up as she went along, and Canaan stopped her. "That is not right Noni. My mom and dad remember that song, but they are not as old as you, so maybe that's why you don't remember it". Luckily, she loves him, even though he called her old!!
Oh, one more thing... Naomi, Happy Birthday, really really late. I have been thinking about you all week, and I am sorry I haven't called you, or E-mailed or anything. I keep thinking about you at 1pm, when I am pretty sure you are a work. Sorry!

First Corinthians 13

This was part of my Bible reading this morning, and I wanted to share it. Use it, or not, as you see fit. (This is taken from "The Message" translation", 1 Cor 6:3-13)

"Our work as God's servants gets validated - or not- in the details. People are watching us as we stay at our post, alertly, unswervingly... in hard times, tough times, bad times; when we're beaten up, jailed and mobbed, working hard, working late, working without eating; with pure heart, clear head, steady hand; in gentleness, holiness and honest love; when we're telling the truth, and when God's showing his power; when we're doing our best setting things right; when we're praised, and when we're blamed; slandered and honored; true to our word, though distrusted; ignored by the world, but recognized by God; terrifically alive, though rumored to be dead; beaten within an inch of our lives, but refusing to die; immersed in tears, yet always filled with deep joy; living on handouts, yet enriching many, having nothing, having it all. ... I can't tell you how much I long for you to enter this wide-open, spacious life. ... Open up your lives. Live openly and expansively!"

Living in DEEP JOY is my life goal. I believe that Christians have the responsibility to live with joy. Regular old happiness is for anyone, anytime. But JOY is so much deeper, so much steadier, and is ALWAYS there, if we remember it. Live with joy my friends. Even when sadness wins, (and it will sometimes, and that is just the way it is) remember that joy is bigger and stronger and totally different. Share it, shine it, live it. JOY!

A slideshow update

Here are some fairly recent pictures. Some are from the weekend before last, and some are a little older then that! I am a little behind in posting pictures!

Small town life

I got my latest cell phone bill and..... I did not go over my minutes this month!!! It is a miracle! I just had to share my excitement. I know that no one else cares, but it is nearly midnight, and Andy is asleep, so I had to tell someone!

I still love my tiny little town. I have walked to the park twice this week, shopped at my little organic market, met the people who live on the road behind me (while we were at the park), saw a snake in the grass, then found out it was dead (but not before scaring my friend Amy half to death, so that she jumped, pulled her baby stroller away with one arm, and managed to totally injure her rotator cuff and now may need surgery!) and I got sunburned. While walking. From the park.

As I said previously, it is nearly midnight. I should got to bed. I think I quit making sense about 20 minutes ago. Sorry!

Travis & Kelsey: Karibu Sana!

Travis and Kelsey have a page now! Hopefully they will be better at updating it together... since Kelsey has not updated her page in almost a year! Check them out, and keep them in your prayers. I believe there are 17 days left until the wedding. Fun times!!!

Travis & Kelsey: Karibu Sana!

Another really bad day...

If you read my blog, you may remember the post about my really bad day. Soon after I had written that, my friend Naomi sent me an E-mail with the story of one of her worst days ever. I finally remembered to ask her if it was okay for me to post it on here, and she said sure, so here it is:

I was thinking about your blog post about the day everything went wrong, and I wondered if I've ever told you about our "day". :) Gideon was 3 1/2, Elijah 2, Isaiah was 9mo, and it was Easter Sunday 2002. I had been up the night before until 2am making homemade cinnamon rolls to take to sunrise service breakfast, and then up at 4am to start getting everybody out the door. We had to leave by 5:30 b/c it was a 1/2 hr drive to church. It had been raining hard for days and we were under a floodwatch. I gave the two big boys some Ovaltine to help them wait until after the service for breakfast, got them dressed in their cute little matching white shirts and green corderoy overalls, put on my brand new Easter outfit, and we were ready to go. We were also teaching children's church that day and Jeremiah had completely lost his voice at a lock-in Friday night, so I was going to have to teach that too.

We managed to get everyone and everything outside and in the van and only slightly soaked. It was raining cats and dogs and still pitch black. We got about a mile from home, and Elijah threw up chocolate milk all over the back of the van. All over. Everywhere. Chunks. So we turned around and went back home, and transferred Gideon and his car seat, the cinnamon rolls, and the children's church material to our other vehicle, and Jeremiah and Gideon left for church, because Jeremiah was the youth minister, and now they were going to be late, and no excuse short of your own death was sufficient for that with our minister.

So I made about 10 trips out to the van, getting Isaiah in and in his crib where he would stay put, and bringing in Elijah's carseat and Elijah, then trying to scrub the worst of the vomit out of the car. When I finally got inside, I looked like I had climbed into the shower in my Sunday dress. Then I had to clean up poor Elijah. I was so grossed out by this time that I took the filthy car seat and stuffed it in our second bathroom and shut the door. I would clean it later. Bad choice. I gave Elijah his bath, and then we snuggled down in the living room to watch veggie tales. Over the next few hours he threw up several times, all without warning, all over the living room floor, hallway, etc. I tried desperately to stay awake on my 2 hrs from the night before.

And then, about 10am, it happened. We had a toy Sesame Street saxophone, battery powered and heavy, and Elijah was playing with it and managed to swing it around and hit himself in the head, just above his right eyebrow, and blood went everywhere! Even I could see that this would need stitches, and there I was at home by myself with two babies and a car and carseat covered in vomit! I tried and tried to call Jeremiah's cell phone while putting pressure on the cut, but he had turned it off for the service. I called the church number over and over, because there was a phone in the nursery. Finally I got Jeremiah, and he said he would head home right away. So I ran and got the carseat and scrubbed the cover out in the bathtub and tossed it in the dryer, then washed the frame, and the whole time Elijah was holding a bloody washcloth on his forehead! Poor baby! Rushing through the kitchen, I managed to whack my foot on a cabinet, and thought I had broken my toe! (It turned out to be just fine.) It hurt so badly, and I had just been wondering what else could go wrong, that I began laughing hysterically. I was still in this state 10 minutes later when Jeremiah got home. Thank goodness he can remain calm in a crisis! It had finally stopped raining, and we got the carseat frame and lined it with towels, since the cover was still soaking wet, piled everyone into Jeremiah's van, and headed for the hospital. Five hours and several stitches later, we finally had our Easter dinner--at the Burger King drive-thru! :) And Elijah has a distinguished-looking scar on his forehead as a momento of that day! :)

I hope you got a good laugh from that--I sure do! I look forward to telling this story to his wife and then to my grandchildren someday! :-) Thank goodness every day isn't this "exciting"!

I think it might be fun to hear about other people's "worst day"... or at least one of them, if you can't narrow it down to one. Feel free to E-mail me, and I will post them, or you can just leave it as a comment.

Laughing about it later really makes it easier, so let's share the laughter!

Life stories...

I have been playing around on Facebook tonight and linked to a group of former Shorter students. Check out the link http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=11263359004
I have really enjoyed reading about where different people have ended up, especially spiritually. I am so impressed by the things that God is doing in the lives of people that I had no hope for. It is amazing what HE can do, after he breaks us. It is awe inspiring what can happen when we stop trying to do everything, ANYTHING, on our own, and just wait on HIM. This is going to sound very negative, but I had very little hope for the Christian Ministry majors during my time at Shorter. I knew they were learning lots of interesting Greek, and theology, but I had not seen much "ministry". Thankfully, God sees a lot farther than I, and had huge, amazing, wonderful things for some amazing men and women, and those amazing men and women came through. I am humbled by my lack of faith in them. I guess when it all boils down, it was a lack of faith in God. He called them... I should have trusted that He would shape them too! I feel like a cheerleader... Go God!!! Yeah!
I just re-read this before posting, and I am afraid it sounds like I think I was more mature, more in touch with God, more something, while I was in college. I truly don't mean it to sound that way. I just knew of too many people that were too worried about rules and regulations, and were convinced to forget about grace and mercy. I am so glad to see that grace and mercy and simply loving are priorities for them.
I should go to sleep before I say something stupid. I hope this makes sense!

More wedding plans

It is so much fun to be in on planning a wedding. I think it is a lot more fun to just be part of it, without being the person who is getting married. I get to have all the fun and excitement, without nearly as much stress! Kelsey's wedding it less than a month away now, and things are really starting to pull together. She still has finals, so poor thing, I don't think she is having any fun yet, but I think there is only one week left of school, so then she can really just enjoy her wedding plans. The sisters are throwing her a "personal" shower tomorrow. A bunch of giggling girls, with pretty lingerie. That is going to be a blast!
I am heading back to South GA on Sunday night. I miss my Andy, and I can promise you he has missed me. (6 phone calls a day, on average!) We will be home for about 3 weeks, then be heading back north again for the last week pre-wedding. Fun times!
Tonight I am going to a birthday party for my friend Carrie. I am amazingly excited. I haven't been to a birthday party that wasn't for a child in YEARS! I think that since we are leaving our children at home, all of us ladies may act like children ourselves! If you happen to be in Marietta tonight, don't laugh too hard at a bunch of crazy women wearing princess crowns at the ice skating rink!

Due Date

Today was supposed to be my due date. Surprisingly, it really wasn't bad at all. I remembered it this morning, because when I first found out I was pregnant, Carrie commented that my due date was the same day as a wedding her kids were going to be in. So, since the wedding was today, that reminded me that today was my due date. I really didn't feel like I should have been having a baby today though. I already went through that, several weeks ago, and today just felt like.... well, it just felt like today. Just like any other day. I commented to Andy about it being my due date this morning. I think I was starting to feel a little mopey. He was not sympathetic at all, which was the absolute best thing for me. It was much easier to be a little grumpy with him for a few minutes, then to be mopey all day. So, even though he slightly annoyed me, I am really grateful to him for being "uncaring" about it. The thought stuck around all day, and struck at random moments, but it wasn't a heavy thought, and it didn't weigh me down. God is so faithful.

Today is almost done, and I have mourned my baby very little. I did my mourning at other times. Today I celebrated the children I have with me, and the man I love. I needed to celebrate today. Enough said.

Normal

This morning around 8:15 one of my best friends called me and said, "I just want to have a normal day." She has had a lot of drama in her life recently, and when it was finally starting to slow down, her baby woke up with a fever of 105 degrees this morning, and she was rushing to the doctor. I totally understood what she meant... normal sounds nice. But, I really don't think it exists. Normal for her is not the same as normal for me, and probably not like normal for you either. It just got me thinking again about that word. NORMAL. Seriously, how can anyone define that? We had a lot of discussions about normal when I was growing up, since we were homeschooled, preacher's kids, who moved almost every year, and lived in a foreign country for awhile. We never even attempted to think that we were normal. But, we had our own normal. Our normal could be thrown off balance, just like anyone else's normal. Maybe what I am trying to get to is this question: "How do I want my children to define normal?" I don't want them to think that it is normal to use dirty, nasty, useless and pointless words. I don't want them to think it is normal to shout and scream at each other every time you have a disagreement. I don't want them to think it is normal to threaten violence to solve problems.

I DO want them to think it is normal to approach the throne of God with absolutely every issue in their life. I do want them to think it is normal to show affection openly to each other. I do want them to think it is normal to enjoy a good book, watch a good movie, spend time together as a family, help those less fortunate, and share love with everyone without exception.

There are so many things that can define normal. What is normal for you? Do you have a plan? You have to decide what your normal is, or you will end up following someone else's normal, which will be wrong for you.

On a lighter note... a piece of advice. If you remember really liking a movie as a child, yet haven't watched it since you were a child, don't watch it again. It totally ruins a movie to watch it again, after decades of memories! Canaan checked out the Ewok movie today at the library. The acting is absolutely horrid!!! I remember liking that movie. I think I just liked the Ewoks. Canaan thinks they are great. I guess I will let him love it, then make sure that he never sees it again, so he can hold onto the positive memory of it! It was scarier then I remembered too. Canaan is almost never scared, so I am not worried about him, but I am surprised that I was not scared by it as a child. We checked out both of the Ewok movies, so maybe the other one will be as good as I remember. Don't worry, I won't count on it! I have already planned to be disappointed.

Speaking of movies though, did anyone watch the PBS showing of Sense and Sensibility? It was so good. I liked it better then the one with Kate what's her name? Winslett? Titanic girl. Anyway, it was much better. S and S has always been my favorite, although Emma is a close second. I have always related to Elinor, so I was thrilled when that little survey matched me with her. The PBS version of the movie was very well done, and if anyone who reads this is someone who buys me presents (MOM, are you reading this?) I would love to have it on DVD so I can watch it again. If all else fails, Emilee will probably buy it for herself, and then I can borrow it!

Today was library day again. We were planning to ride our bikes, since my neighbor has a bike trailer for her daughter and Zion to ride in. When we were getting ready to leave it looked like rain, and my bike tire was flat, so we ended up driving. Story hour was great, and we stayed extra long, and when we were leaving the weather was absolutely gorgeous. Made me wish I had ridden my bike!! Next week I am going to plan ahead better, and have my tires ready to go!

Potty Training...

I just finished posting, and Zion came and brought me a present. It was his diaper, removed from his behind, and completely full. Just when I think we are finally making progress, that he is getting this potty thing, he proves me wrong. So, I clean him up, or so I think. A few minutes later he comes to climb into my lap, and I somehow end up with poop all over my pants. It seems he was hiding some behind his knee! How, I do not know, but he managed! Life as a potty training Mommy is quite an adventure!

A spring time walk

I feel like such a small town girl. Today my neighbor and I, and our kids walked to Story Hour at the local library. After story hour we walked down to the organic market and bought some fruit, then took a detour across the street to the thrift shop. By then it was 12:45 or so, and we were hungry, so we walked down to the tiny little diner and had sandwiches, then finally got around to walking home. It was nearly 2pm by then, and my stroller was fully loaded down with library book and produce, but I just felt so good! I love the fact that we can walk places! On the way home Canaan was not watching where he was going, and accidently ran his bike into a huge muddy ditch. The first person passing by in a car stopped and made sure I could get him out, and the people who came on the other side of the road waited patiently for us to get out of the way. Pretty much every car that we passed during the entire walk waved, and slowed down respectfully, and I never once felt unsafe, even though I was out with my four year old on a bike, and two two year olds in strollers. It has been a long time since I lived in a small town, and I had forgotten how wonderful it is.

I just wanted to brag about how adorable my little town is. In about 8 weeks, when summer gets here, I will not be bragging about walking anywhere. Summer here will be awful. But... I am surely enjoying the spring!